The Last Exorcism (Part II)

I guess the first movie title was a lie.  I have to admit, even though it's pretty easy to guess which movies will get sequels, I didn't see this one coming.  The follow-up to The Last Exorcism, which featured one of 2010's best film-character-names, Cotton Marcus, looks to have ditched the "documentary" style of the first film and gone with a more traditional style of filmmaking.  This is good, because now I don't have to listen to people tell me it's real.  Yes, people believed the first one was "found footage."  On a side note, I saw Paranormal Activity in theaters and at the end people were crying.  This is the world we live in.

First of all, Hollywood needs to realize that just because they add the sound effects of bones crunching and cracking, it doesn't mean the audience believes they actually are.  Generally, I would suspend my disbelief, but not for a nice stretch in bed before you get up in the morning.

Little kids do this shit all the time

Also, the demon's name.  Abalam? I understand that demons don't have names like Mike or Dave, but I really find nothing menacing in the name Abalam.  In fact, once I learned the demon's name, I was even less interested in seeing this movie than I was originally.  There is no need to name the demon that is plaguing your main character, just refer to it as "the demon."

Here's three demon-related movies and their demons' shitty names.

Movie                               Demon Name
Drag Me to Hell               Lamia
Sinister                            Bagul
The Exorcist                    Pazuzu

Look how ridiculous those names are.  If I was being possessed by a demon and he told me his name was Pazuzu, I'd kick him right the fuck out of my body.  The only demons I'm afraid of are bald and starred in The Phantom.

Fuck, he brought up The Phantom

Horror movies are different from every other genre of movie.  They need to elicit fear from the viewer in order to be considered successful.  The thing is there are so many terrible horror movies that a good one really is a diamond in the rough.  Overall, TLE pt. 2 isn't the worst horror movie trailer I've seen, but it doesn't look that great, either.  Horror movies are generally about two things for me, which are usually (but not always) separate.

1)  Scare Factor- Is it legitimately creepy/scary?  Do the death scenes look relatively realistic? 

2)  Humor Factor- Is it so cheesy and terrible that it's entertaining?  Is it self-parodying?

If a horror movie lacks either of those two requirements, it's a bust for me.  Thankfully, there looks to be enough creepiness in The Last Exorcism pt. 2 that it may not be a complete waste of time.

Overall, I'd like to say I Won't See It, but I know this shit's getting Redbox'd on some boring Tuesday night.  

Bonus Zane